down memory lane

Spoilt biological clock, 4.39am now and I'm wide awake, just that my brain isnt absorbing anything. I need to sleep real soon cos my complexion is slowly being destroyed plus it's PMS this few weeks and I hate it.

I realise that childhood memories and scars really stays. By now, you probably know that my family is broken and I've got nothing to hide about that. Recently, I realise that God's promise of my own complete family in the future is one of my reference point in this walk. I still vividly rmb that feeling of something breaking loose when Pastor Lia spoke about that years ago. Something changed and God spoke too. Inside of me, I get very happy when marriages are reconcile and my heartbreaks when couples files for divorce, those kind of feelings avails even when watching television. I reckon that my parents really hurt me very badly due to the divorce. I cant tell you in detail what happen cos I will really take a million yrs to do so. But divorce hurts the kids badly. Everything was an open wound till I meet the man of my life, God. He healed the wounds one by one, removed the scab and leave it as scars. Sometimes I really dont knw how to love my parents for the things they have done, but God says love with His love. It wasnt easy to forgive any of them for the misdeeds but I did it still. The last bit of scab towards my father dropped off few weeks ago and now I'm a free bird. Now let's work on my mum's.

On a random note, Stella says that my msn pm is like gunpowder - "and i refuse to give you the attention you want". Hahs. For the irritants. When I stopped replying you on msn for many manay times, you got to know that I'm really irritated and stop talking to me. Hahs yea, very bitchy here I admit, scream at ur pc if you need to.