you dont have the right

Procrastination frm studying.
Intended to start revision since ytd but i decide to sleep in early last night. And today im procrastinating agn because if i dont blog today, i will probably forget abt my blog until im quite free.

School has been such a bitch.
Got into trouble with the authorities, for not paying attention in class and being late for a few times! And my 2.5 GPA is considered wayyyyyyyyyyyy low to them.
So they are saying that science students cant enjoy normal poly life.

School has been taking up so much of my time that i hardly get to go shopping.
I want shopping!!!
I've been wearing the same old clothes & footwear all day long that im so sick of them or they are all breaking down :( i dont care if shopping burns a hole in my pocket.
I'm so looking forward to the 2 wks term break.

This yr really felt like the rough-est yr of my life.
Everything that's happening is from within. I used to be so affected by PO, but this time round, the feeling is worst than that.
For once,
i felt like im destroying my own future,
i felt inadaquate,
i felt that i have let down everyone who pin their hopes on me,
i felt like im not breaking my own ceiling,
i felt that my life wasnt stable,
i feel that i lost to the inner battle that i've been fighting all along,
i feel out of place,
i feel that im way too fat,
i feel that im losing control.
Worst of all, i felt like my life is so messed up that i dont knw where to start picking up from. Everything seems so important to me that i cannot let go or slow down at any one.
K if you have good advices or encouragement, pls tell me.
If you only have tons of questions to bombard at me or questions that you think you can push me on, i think you better keep them to yourself. I alrdy know abt the flaws i have in my life and they are affecting me alot in this rough time, i dont need anyone to rub salt into my wound.

Screw my pride tonight.