Today, as i play my off tune piano with my rusty skills, i realise that my childhood has been a horrible nightmare. A nightmare that scare me to tears. I thought about everything my parents told me about each other. I wondered to myself, what kind of environment did i really grow up in. Everyone in my family, they aint what they appear to be. I thought the wound that have always been there is starting to heal but i was wrong. It has never been any more painful than this. I know that this is God's work in my life, to heal the wounds and so i can move on. I hope that this time of healing wont take forever, it will be fast. I have too much principles and responsibility that i cannot collasped at this. It feels like im starting all over again, its all back to zero, back to the basics, back to submission, back to obedience, back to dependance.
